** Reviewed,  Family Ministry,  Parenting and Family Life

Preteens and Porn

Let’s face it we live in a society obsessed with SEX. Sex is used to sell everything from underwear to shampoo to cars. It’s nearly impossible to watch any TV show or movie without some sexual innuendo, if not the actual act. Sex is everywhere. As parents of preteens we would prefer to think that this doesn’t effect our kids, but it does. In the midst of this hypersexual society pornography has become easier to get than ever before. I remember as a kid all I knew about porn was that there were some magazines behind the counter wrapped in brown paper. Today full blown, hardcore, pornography is just a few clicks away. As parents we CAN’T IGNORE THIS. We need to be aware of it. We need to take steps to protect our kids. We need to prepare them. AND we need to  prepare ourselves for when they are exposed to PORNOGRAPHY.

Be aware. You may not want to think about it, but your preteen has access to pornography. You can deny it if you like, but it’s true. We have to admit that this problem exists if we are going to be prepared to deal with it. From tablets, to computers, to smart phones they are just a few clicks away from stuff that you would never want them to see. Youtube, Google, Instagram, even Netflix all have stuff that is inappropriate for anyone to view, especially your preteens. Trust me when I say its everywhere and your preteen knows how to find it.

Protect them. Pornography is a problem. It can have a lasting effect on your preteens that can stay with them for the rest of there lives. It can damage their relationships, especially there future marriage. As a parent we want to and need to protect our kids from something so damaging, but how?

  • Smart phone: No preteen (or teen for that matter) needs a smart phone. I know that many preteens have them. In fact there are probably people reading this whose preteens have them. I certainly don’t mean to offend anyone. But, consider this for a minute. With an awareness of the problem and availability of pornography on the internet do you really want your preteen to have complete, unmonitored access to the internet…all the time?
  • Computers: Put computers where they can be monitored. Can you think of one good reason that your child needs a computer in their room? I can’t. I’m sure they would like it that way, but it is not our jobs to make them happy. It IS, however, our job to protect them and do what we know is best for them. So, keep their computer in a common area where you can monitor their activity at any moment.
  • Parental controls: Use of the internet is a privilege, not a right. For this reason we, as parents, have the right and responsibility to control how and when our preteens use the internet. This means putting controls on your wireless network and on your home computers that limit what your preteens have access to. It may even mean putting controls on WHEN your preteen has access to your home network. Remember internet is a privilege.
  • Conversation: This is a tough topic to talk about among adults. It is even harder to talk about with your preteen, but it is vital that you do. This conversation can start as simply as cautioning your preteen that there are things on the internet that they shouldn’t look at or watch. Without getting too specific you can talk with them about the some of the kinds of things that you are talking about. This can begin your preteen thinking a little more about what they view on the internet and through other media sources. This can also lead to more in-depth conversations as your preteen becomes a teen and beyond.

Respond. Finally we have to be prepared in case our preteen does become exposed or is found to have been viewing pornography. However, this is a topic for another post. Stay tuned for more on this topic in a future post.

Matt Norman

Thanks for reading this post. I hope you enjoyed it. To ensure that you never miss a post subscribe using the space on the right side of the screen.

I am a Christian, husband, father, pastor, church planter, nurse, and freelance writer.

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